SilverDogEars

A fire burns inside my chest, the hollow Crevice of my breast The flames are licking up my spine I've denied this power all this time The sun and stars course through my veins All fear and doubt have burned away I lost my soul amid the snow So I lived these years just like a ghost The darkness crushed and tortured me But that's not who I'm meant to be An empty shell without a heart I found it frozen, searching for a spark My dance with death has taught me much about love, and life, and peoples' limits I learned that living life is sacred Because death, not pain, is really endless To find peace I had to want to be alive I lea

I was so naive. To think the problem was really between me and my fat thighs. That it was really all about the extra pounds. That if I could just be skinny I would be happy. I really, truly believed that; I made it my reality. I see now, that my obsession with being thin was rooted in a desperate desire to disappear, to be invisible, to take up as little space as possible because I didn't feel worthy enough to fill it with my body. I felt, although I hardly could articulate this feeling to myself at the time, like I didn't deserve to occupy my body, to fill the space around me with joy and happiness and desire. And love. This fundamental

if love was this thin i would rather hate my body full and thick if love was this fickle to me i would hate everybody and fight to stay sick somewhere between one hundred and five i find a place inside of me that wants to be alive death dances too close holding my hand and coursing me "you will be happy only in the face of change, wither away and your reward will be great" if love could spin this deception our world would be dark as people we are all players let love in and act the part you could be loved and be Love

inhale, exhale every breath i take life, leaving i am giving fire to the lives that spring from every breath i take. life, receiving i am taking in the wind that lifts my spirit to the sky. inhale that which i am so i may exhale that which makes you.

you are the satellite i spy every time the sun sets constant in the sky the wind that pulls and lulls me by and by is your scent and the sound of your sweet lullaby birds and bees the trees and the breeze fly and glide whilst they swing and sway in the fray of better days hold me under waves and thunder couldn't clash and smash apart my heart this is not a dream you are my amphetamine